Slippin Into Darkness
Right now, this War song sums up the beginning of my weekend with mom.
When I was eleven years old in 1972 War and Sly and The Family Stone were huge in my little life. I heard them at school playing jacks in the gym at lunch and on the radio at home. Early funk leanings....music from that time is still some of my most favorite and comfortable grooves.
This song though, is about perspective, how you look at and perceive things. Here is a quote from Songfacts.com about this song - stay with me here, I have a point...
"This song is about trying not to slip off that other side, the deep end.
War drummer and founding member Harold Brown told us: "Howard (Scott,
War guitarist) was working on some lyrics and he had this concept,
thinking of how one could slip into darkness. Your mind could just go
on, and you just go off to the left - you have to be careful, you have
to say, 'Don't go there.' It's like that wall between sane and insane.
We all figure we're sane, and once in a while we look past that wall,
our head pops over and we look and we say, 'Here's Johnny.' I always
like that. You look over there and you see certain things, and some of
us have been known to go over there and stay, and there's some that pop
their heads right back. Because that's just right on that borderline of
sane, insane, and really close to being a genius.
You get in that moment of creation and you start seeing things different than the way a lot of other people are seeing it. Most of the stuff we're seeing, it's accessible to all of us, but then we go and take these different words or materials. It's how you rearrange it that makes it different and it presents itself. Like a tree. I look at a tree, and I say, Okay I could do a couple of things with that tree. We can let it stay there, it's beautiful, I can cut it down, make firewood, or I can make furniture with it but rearrange it. You have to watch that balance. That's when guys start getting all blown out on drugs and stuff, and become crazy. You find out the people that have the highest amount of creativity, there's a fine line between them being sane and insane. They're the ones I find, guys that are really out there. You got to have a certain way to talk to them, you got to know their moods. You got to know those events, those episodes, when you're dealing with them.
I can think of a few, like our bass player (B.B. Dickerson). He's a brilliant person, the one that sang 'World Is A Ghetto.' He's so in touch. I think he went to Tibet and those places when he was very young, and he started seeing different things and experiencing different cultures and different glimpses of various wisdom. So a lot of time B.B. is very sensitive. I know there's a certain time I can go and give him a hug, and a certain time I know, don't touch. When he's in his certain mood or certain zone, I let him there, because I can go into his world and all of a sudden startle him. That's just amazing. I read a book called Creators On Creating, and they wanted to find out the state of mind of people when they're creating, like the guy that came up with DNA, or Einstein - they've got that fine line. You'll find generally that they're sensitive people. Different things can affect them different ways, so it's a balance you've got to find."
You get in that moment of creation and you start seeing things different than the way a lot of other people are seeing it. Most of the stuff we're seeing, it's accessible to all of us, but then we go and take these different words or materials. It's how you rearrange it that makes it different and it presents itself. Like a tree. I look at a tree, and I say, Okay I could do a couple of things with that tree. We can let it stay there, it's beautiful, I can cut it down, make firewood, or I can make furniture with it but rearrange it. You have to watch that balance. That's when guys start getting all blown out on drugs and stuff, and become crazy. You find out the people that have the highest amount of creativity, there's a fine line between them being sane and insane. They're the ones I find, guys that are really out there. You got to have a certain way to talk to them, you got to know their moods. You got to know those events, those episodes, when you're dealing with them.
I can think of a few, like our bass player (B.B. Dickerson). He's a brilliant person, the one that sang 'World Is A Ghetto.' He's so in touch. I think he went to Tibet and those places when he was very young, and he started seeing different things and experiencing different cultures and different glimpses of various wisdom. So a lot of time B.B. is very sensitive. I know there's a certain time I can go and give him a hug, and a certain time I know, don't touch. When he's in his certain mood or certain zone, I let him there, because I can go into his world and all of a sudden startle him. That's just amazing. I read a book called Creators On Creating, and they wanted to find out the state of mind of people when they're creating, like the guy that came up with DNA, or Einstein - they've got that fine line. You'll find generally that they're sensitive people. Different things can affect them different ways, so it's a balance you've got to find."
I've been thinking about how the brain works, creativity and dementia - three HUGE themes in my life right now.
And, some good ol fashion dementia weirdness I thought I'd share with you.
Just Roll With It Baby!
Mom and I go out to dinner Friday night at a sweet new independent restaurant. She's SO excited to support a new local business, help someone's dream along to success. And the food's good! She orders a fish sandwich, a coney dog for myself and diet cokes. Her sandwich arrives open face with two medium sized pieces of battered fish, lettuce and tomato. Declaring it's really big for her she just eats the fish and a couple of fries. We talk, have a nice time and mom asks for a box for the rest of her meal. For me... to eat later at home....a bun, NO fish, tartar sauce and tomato - plus the rest of the fries.....ok. Just roll with it, it's her being sweet; who am I to spoil the moment...really. Perspective...I'm going to have to rely on it A LOT later on when things are worse.
This afternoon I'm going through the items in the FBI style Christmas bag switcherroo that Dreamer and I pulled when she was home last. YES Dreamer....I'm STILL going through everything in that damned over stuffed bag you gave me with filled with things mom should not be referencing because they are old and already taken care of or not relevant. (She'd find old bills and think they were new, get worried)
Here is a sampling of the strata from that bag:
*an investing statement with a recipe for classic cinnamon buns taped to the back
*a to do list piece of paper with 'BLAH BLAH BLAH printed at the top (by manufacturer) with a list of bills paid and amounts on it ...kinda of a banker's joke...or just a mom-ism lol
*shit you not: a charitable donation order form for postcards, jigsaw puzzles and bookmarks from...
THE FOOT AND MOUTH PAINTING ARTISTS. I understand everyone has to make a buck, but from a dementia patient to....oh lawd....
Dreamer! You saved her from making a donation to Mouth and Foot Artists lol! And this is just a small random sampling. Mom just normally mixes financial documents with crochet patterns or recipes.
And this is ALL about perspective and how you view things. Darkness, or a new kind of light. Loving who she was AND who she is now. Cherishing the moments and the lessons. Digging deep and loving large.
I'll leave you with another favorite War song "All Day Music"