Room for Reflection, Grief, Hope and Laughter

Voyageur and I started this blog because when we first got mom’s diagnosis we were overwhelmed with information, stricken with grief and no time nor desire to go to a support group.  We wished we could readily find information of how to handle the early stages of dementia.  And how to handle institutions that stood in our way.

We quickly learned we were pioneers traveling a road many had traveled before us.  But we couldn’t find what we were looking for.  Also, people were not telling us what we would face, the emotions we were likely to experience, the potential roadblocks in our way, and the incredible importance of self care.

My experience so far:

Grief.  I experience it everyday.  I now know to make time for it.  Don’t let the phase ‘don’t wallow in grief’ stop you from experiencing it.  Sometimes it will feel like it won’t end.  It will.  I used to run from grief.  It has become my teacher.  When to stop working so much, making sure I take time to eat, rest, play, be a goof.

Reflection.  In the definition of embody or represent along with deep thinking.  I have come to realize there are attributes of mom I admire and have incorporated in my being.  For me, it’s become important that I carry a piece of me with her.  Do that for yourself.  It helps remind me of her essence.

Hope.  I am called the Pollyanna in the family.  I take pride in that.  Hope is the lifeline in the journey of this disease.  I like the definition that hope is a feeling of trust.  I trust that we will all be ok no matter where this disease takes us.  I hope for a cure, prevention, treatment.  I trust in the love of family and friends.

Laughter.  I’m a shit-assed serious person.  Love philosophy.  Love to debate.  Not so good at telling a joke.  Find the laughter.  It will save your ass and those around you.  Surround yourself with people who make you laugh. 

I have found a silly cat video online.  I watch it daily.  

I also play ‘Angry Birds’.  The first hour I played it I giggled the entire time from the sound effects.  Find what makes you giggle.  Create the time for laughter. 

Find what lifts your soul.  It will carry you through.