Happy Mom's Day
This Mother's Day is bittersweet for sure. I'm not able to get back home, but hopefully will sometime soon. Mom is doing well in her new digs. The staff adore her, she is less agitated and seems happy. The executive director told me the other day that Mom is smiling. Yesterday I talked with Mom on the phone, she knows where I live, and repeated sentences only once or twice. She did not ask me incessantly when I am coming home. She is talking about Dad in the present tense. So I talk about him in the present tense. Kinda nice actually.
I'm starting to get into a little bit of a rhythm talking with her on the phone. Have to wait til it's between 1pm and 4pm her time or between 6pm and 7pm. The later I call, the more sundowners has settled in. It's not too bad, she's just a little more jumbled. Definitely mixed emotions around this day. I have a friend who is Mom's age. And I think she's mentally more sharp than me. Sometimes I troubleshoot an issue or two with her that normally I would have sought Mom's advice.
In a bizarre way, I've kinda grown up over the past year. Pieces of advice I would've asked my mom, I now seek the answers on the Internet or from friends (and yes, in that order, sorry). Except for my friends who are in their 70s, cause they are just wise.
The strangest piece of talking with Mom right now, is she sounds like herself. That Mom who would give me advice whether I asked for it or not. She is still so there. And her brain is failing her. Not just memory, more cognitive cloudiness. Time has collapsed - spring and fall are intertwined. Home from 40 years ago and home from 3 months ago co-exist.
And her symptoms seemed to have slowed a little - at least it doesn't feel like we all have just been thrown off a massive cliff. She asks me more questions - what am I eating, who are my friends, what do I like to do, do I like my job. The last couple of conversations were over 10 minutes. I am eternally grateful for the incomparable staff of the memory care facility Mom is in.
Gotta tell ya, this is the most relaxed, not worried I have been since Mom's diagnosis. Now, we just hope her money holds out her lifetime. But that's to worry for another day. Happy Mother's Day!
Voyageur - pen to paper girl :)
I'm starting to get into a little bit of a rhythm talking with her on the phone. Have to wait til it's between 1pm and 4pm her time or between 6pm and 7pm. The later I call, the more sundowners has settled in. It's not too bad, she's just a little more jumbled. Definitely mixed emotions around this day. I have a friend who is Mom's age. And I think she's mentally more sharp than me. Sometimes I troubleshoot an issue or two with her that normally I would have sought Mom's advice.
In a bizarre way, I've kinda grown up over the past year. Pieces of advice I would've asked my mom, I now seek the answers on the Internet or from friends (and yes, in that order, sorry). Except for my friends who are in their 70s, cause they are just wise.
The strangest piece of talking with Mom right now, is she sounds like herself. That Mom who would give me advice whether I asked for it or not. She is still so there. And her brain is failing her. Not just memory, more cognitive cloudiness. Time has collapsed - spring and fall are intertwined. Home from 40 years ago and home from 3 months ago co-exist.
And her symptoms seemed to have slowed a little - at least it doesn't feel like we all have just been thrown off a massive cliff. She asks me more questions - what am I eating, who are my friends, what do I like to do, do I like my job. The last couple of conversations were over 10 minutes. I am eternally grateful for the incomparable staff of the memory care facility Mom is in.
Gotta tell ya, this is the most relaxed, not worried I have been since Mom's diagnosis. Now, we just hope her money holds out her lifetime. But that's to worry for another day. Happy Mother's Day!
Voyageur - pen to paper girl :)