From Sadness and Anger to Action
Mom's birthday is Monday. She will be 72. From what I can tell, Mom is at moderate to severe cognitive decline or somewhere in the moderate to severe stages of the disease. And I'm all over the map with Kubler-Ross' stages of grief. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Yep, all of them. Almost as jumbled as Mom's brain.
Now that Mom is in a safe place, talking with her on the phone has become more of a challenge. Morning is no longer good as they have morning activities, then lunch - so I try to call her at my lunch time as I am 3 hours behind her. If I miss that time slot, we are pretty much done for the day as they have an early dinner and then a few evening activities and then bed. Damn. Our phone calls are between 5-10 minutes and almost every other sentence she is asking me when I am coming for a visit. Shit I was just there lady :)
On the up side, she is crocheting again. When I talk with her on the phone, she seems to be happier than she was. But she is still agitated. Still wants to go home. This past fall she was declining some, but the winter hit her hard and the disease progressed at a rapid rate. So rapid, Voyageur and I could barely catch our breath. The bottom fell out - kinda like that really scary ride where you spin around really fast and then the bottom drops out. Like that. And then it all stops really fast. Kinda like that. Still trying to get my bearings as to all of what's happened in the last two months. Mom wandered, luckily with neighbors help, the cops found her; round the clock care; researched and found a facility; made sure money and long term care in place; moved her; beginning to clean out the house to prepare for its sale.
I've read about this stuff, but was totally unprepared for all the emotion and the crazy emotional roller coaster. And then the helplessness. There is nothing I can do or say to make her better. I can just be there for her. Be her daughter. Be Voyageur's sister. I am a person of action, can't stand this helplessness thing. So I've committed myself to contacting every member of Congress by both phone and email and educating them about this disease. And the need for them to take action. The scientists say they are about a decade away from a cure, but they need money. Lots of money. So here's a way y'all can take some action - you can sign an online petition to tell your members of Congress to step up. You can also call or send a handwritten letter to your Senator and Congressmember telling your story. It's the best way I know to deal with my crazy emotional roller coaster ride.
Back at ya Voyageur.
Now that Mom is in a safe place, talking with her on the phone has become more of a challenge. Morning is no longer good as they have morning activities, then lunch - so I try to call her at my lunch time as I am 3 hours behind her. If I miss that time slot, we are pretty much done for the day as they have an early dinner and then a few evening activities and then bed. Damn. Our phone calls are between 5-10 minutes and almost every other sentence she is asking me when I am coming for a visit. Shit I was just there lady :)
On the up side, she is crocheting again. When I talk with her on the phone, she seems to be happier than she was. But she is still agitated. Still wants to go home. This past fall she was declining some, but the winter hit her hard and the disease progressed at a rapid rate. So rapid, Voyageur and I could barely catch our breath. The bottom fell out - kinda like that really scary ride where you spin around really fast and then the bottom drops out. Like that. And then it all stops really fast. Kinda like that. Still trying to get my bearings as to all of what's happened in the last two months. Mom wandered, luckily with neighbors help, the cops found her; round the clock care; researched and found a facility; made sure money and long term care in place; moved her; beginning to clean out the house to prepare for its sale.
I've read about this stuff, but was totally unprepared for all the emotion and the crazy emotional roller coaster. And then the helplessness. There is nothing I can do or say to make her better. I can just be there for her. Be her daughter. Be Voyageur's sister. I am a person of action, can't stand this helplessness thing. So I've committed myself to contacting every member of Congress by both phone and email and educating them about this disease. And the need for them to take action. The scientists say they are about a decade away from a cure, but they need money. Lots of money. So here's a way y'all can take some action - you can sign an online petition to tell your members of Congress to step up. You can also call or send a handwritten letter to your Senator and Congressmember telling your story. It's the best way I know to deal with my crazy emotional roller coaster ride.
Back at ya Voyageur.