Busted By My Sis...

I haven't written here for a while and feel like I should apologize.  Honestly, the holidays knocked the wind out of me.  Then there's doing battle with freaked out screwed up family members.  Thank gawd for my sister and other, wonderful family members and friends who support me and balance things out.  I'd be so lost without all of you.

I needed a vacation from the holidays and time to reflect on the last couple of months.

I often tell my sister, our incredible long distance caregiver, that we are in the places we should be for mom.  We each have a role, and it's different from the other. We make one bad ass team working on mom's behalf, but individually our roles are different.

Here's the reason: we have our own, different relationship with mom independent of each other.

Dreamer mentioned that she tried to grocery shop with mom.  It worked, but not so well.  For whatever reason I can cajole, gently remind, joke and whatever else I need to do to keep her on budget, on task and not buy 80 milliondy extra bottles of pop or cartons of ice cream, getting honest to god nutrients into her. She lets me, allows me to do that.  Not Dreamer.

I feel like I'm in part mom's rudder, I can safely maneuver her though life and the confusion her disease brings.  Make no mistake, I'm still her daughter. But I steer for her when she cannot, she leans on me when her brain fails her.

My sister's role when she's home is to just be her daughter.  Mom can be 'a mom' truly around her, not an Alzheimer's patient, but a mom.  That's who she is at her core.  What a gift to give to her, to let her be who she is and not the disappearing woman.

Together sis and I are a rockin team of undercover agents making sure she's taken care of, loved and as happy as we can make her.  We solve all manner of challenges and problems that pop up like whack a moles.

And we sometimes need vacations from the vacation...

Hope you all are well and strong, kicking ass in the new year.
Back to you Dreamer
Voyageur